- Chapter Three -
Suddenly, I Became Me


Me, with model planes
For four years I lived in Ardmore, Oklahoma: from birth to just after my fourth birthday. I remember very little from this time period, but of what I do remember I will tell. My family and I lived in a trailer home outside of the Ardmore city limits. We had at least three horses, one of which we still own. There was a chicken pen behind our house and we had many chickens living there. I remember one encounter with our cat, Scaredy Cat as she was called, in which she had a litter of kittens. She and her kittens resided in a doghouse behind our house. I liked cats-and kittens-so I decided I would pet one of them-bad idea, especially with its mother present. Yes, there was a reason the mother cat's name was Scaredy Cat. She was not a proponent of human companionship. As I reached my hand inside the doghouse, she began to hiss and growl, and I was not fazed-not until she struck. I don't remember how much it hurt or what happened after, but I know that I did not reach my hand in there with Scaredy Cat again.

Across the street from my house was a man named Bud. One time when Mom, Dad, and me were in his yard talking with him, he said he would give me a ride on his tractor, but after the conversation was over I suppose both of us had forgotten about the ride. I remembered about it once I got back home, but for some reason never said anything or complained about it, even though I really wanted to go for a ride on his tractor.


The boat
When we lived in Ardmore, we owned a boat that was painted a blue color. We would go to Lake Murray on occasion, and my parents, and maybe my siblings-I don't remember for sure,-would ski. I wasn't allowed since I was too young. Before moving to Decatur, we sold the boat, so I never have had the chance to go water skiing.


- Christmas -
Marie, James, me playing Hungry Hungry Hippos
I have little memory of my first year in Decatur, Illinois, except that I was happy that I didn't have a bedtime since I hadn't started kindergarten, and both my brother and sister did have a bedtime. The house next to and facing my house was that of the Cook's. I became good friends with Violet, who is the same age as me, her younger sister Erin, and their older brother Jonathan. This year in Decatur was the first time I remember being afraid of the dark-or what may be lurking in the dark. This fear has actually lasted a long time, it's just that now I know there isn't anything to fear, but back then I wasn't so sure. I began sleeping in my parents bed at this time and this lasted for maybe two years until I began sleeping in my own room. Another time during this year, as recounted by my mother:
"When you were around five years old, I was awakened by the doorbell. I went and answered the door to find our neighbor standing there holding you in his arms sleeping. He told me you had sleep walked to their house."

All this has helped form my personality and started the creation of who I am today. The next part of my life was schooling, which helped even more in the formation of my personality and preferences.


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